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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
