the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
