last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
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