I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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