Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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