I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Randomize
