i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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