while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Randomize
