I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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