Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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