you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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