she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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