okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
