You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Randomize
