He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
