Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
