i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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