i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
