do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
