I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Randomize
