Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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