that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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