i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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