guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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