And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
