is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
