I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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