I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize
