I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
