I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Just puked most of my soul out..
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