kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize