If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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