CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
