He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Randomize
