I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize