btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
