I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Randomize
