I could have mohawked her pubes.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
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