Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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