I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
