did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
