I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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