Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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