Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize