it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
did you just send me my own nude
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
