i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
