If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
