They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
