dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
