I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Randomize